A short Scottish Script for your amusement . . . so funny you may well laugh your socks off (provided you're not wearing your wellies.

Script Title : Mud or flames by Stuart Macfarlane

Script :

MUD OR FLAMES?



FIREMAN: Hello, we’re frae the fire brigade and that. We’re here tae put oot yer fire.



F/X: CRACKLING OF FIRE

WOMAN: Oh aye? Well gonnie take aff yer boots furst?



F/X: CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

FIREMAN: Whit?



F/X: CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

WOMAN: Gonnie take those boots aff?



F/X: CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

FIREMAN: Whit fur?



F/X: CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

WOMAN: Ah’ve jist hud this new kerpet put doon.



F/X: CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

FIREMAN: But missus, yer hoose is up in flames!



F/X: CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

WOMAN: Look, jist cos ma hoose is burnin’ doon disnae mean Ah need tae let ma standards slip completely – so get thase boots aff right now.



END

Script is copyright Stuart Macfarlane - you are free to use it provided you request permission from the webmaster.

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