A short Scottish Script for your amusement . . . so funny you may well laugh your socks off (provided you're not wearing your wellies.

Script Title : Class Test by Stuart Macfarlane

Script :

CLASS TEST



MR PEACOCK: (LOUDLY) Right, you there . . . yes you . . . what’s the capital of France?



CANDIDATE #1: Ehh . . . ummm . . . wait, I know this . . . is it . . . is it . . . is it Rome?



MR PEACOCK: (LOUDLY) No it is not! Go and sit at the back of the class with the other pathetic failures.

(PAUSE)

Okay you – what is eleven multiplied by twelve?



CANDIDATE #2: Oh, not fair, maths isn’t my strong subject . . .



MR PEACOCK: (LOUDLY) Come on – I need your answer.



CANDIDATE #2: Is it one-hundred-and-twenty-one . . . no wait one-hundred-and-thirty-six . . . am I warm?



MR PEACOCK: (LOUDLY) Pathetic – quite pathetic. Go and sit at the back.

(PAUSE)

Right that’s the test finished. All the teachers at the back please collect your P45’s on the way out. And stop moaning – how many times have I warned you that I would rid Scotland of all its bad teachers!!!



END

Script is copyright Stuart Macfarlane - you are free to use it provided you request permission from the webmaster.

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